THE NIGHT BEFORE ONLINE POKER SAFETY

THE NIGHT BEFORE ONLINE POKER SAFETY

Twas the night before online protection, at an online poker house

All the supers were playing, even PotRipper louse;

The bets were all made with correct odds and care,

In the hopes that the river wold bring no despair;

A super user is ready for signal all green,

while images of everyone's hole cards flashed on his screen;

And “Dan Druff” in his skivvies and me in my suite,

were ready for all sites to give supers the boot;

When on the poker table there popped up logo,

I leaned forward to see if it was time to go go;

Away to my screen I logged on in a flash,

supplied my credit info and put in some cash;

The picture of the Bull Dog on imaginary felt,

gave the feeling of integrity of all cards to be dealt;

When I realized my eyes were seeing quite clear,

The DealGuardian logo erased all my fear;

With a quick riffle of cards and the click of the mouse,

I knew it was safe to play poker in this house;

As fast a each card was secretly dealt,

The supers were leaving without bringing us to felt;

No PottRippper! No NioNio!
No Sleepless or WhackMe44!

No nvtease! No flatbroke33!
No UtakeIt2 or WhakMe!

Log off! Log off! Your ineffective here!

So leave us to play and you can kiss my fat rear!

The DealGuardian logo will be here for days,

And let us do poker without your cheating ways;

Our hole cards are secret, and future cards too;

Your inside help is no good so eat some poo;

And now sites are dealing, with players in mind;

I'll make my pot sized bet, like every good grind;

That DealGuardian logo has shown up in time,

I now know these sites are free of the grime;

My skills are now winning, I have no despair;

The decks are not stacked they are shuffled with care;

The DG Logo with teeth showing bright;

Will let me hang on to my bankroll tonight;

That spiked collar shows that protection is here;

And all poker players can play without fear;

He has a stern face and his eyes in dead stair;

For cheaters he hates and a new one he'll tear;

He's a watchful old canine, he protects every hand;

He makes supers, NOT supers just helpless and bland;

With a riff of the deck and my public key given;

He deals me my cards and and keeps everything hidden;

He does not say much, because that's not his job;

He deals us the cards so no one can rob;

At the end of the hand, that old Bull Dog supplies;

The results of the hand so the card room complies;

He does it so quick, that the players don't know;

The card room does not even have all the info;

So I proclaim to all, ask your card rooms tonight;

Help fill all you super users with DealGuardian Fright!

Merry Christmas from Secure Card Dealer!

Why would online poker rooms want you to bust out?

Why would online poker rooms want you to go bust on their site? At first glance this question appears to have no merit. Online poker rooms make their money on rake and tournament fees, so there would be no reason for them to want me to bust out. How about this?

The cash you put into an online poker account is sitting in an off-shore account. This account is owned and controlled by the poker site. As more people deposit at the poker site, the larger the account grows and the more interest it is able to generate. If you win enough playing online, eventually you are going to pull money out of this account. If the poker room is using the interest from this account as a part of their revenue, well then they get hurt when withdrawals are made from their account. But, if you go broke there is probably a good chance you will re-deposit and grow the poker sites account.

Re-deposit bonuses are a good way to attract players to put more money into an online poker account. Even if you do get some of the bonus cash promised to you, the poker site still has all of it in their account. Heck, the bonus money does not even have to be real unless they get enough withdrawals to have to pay up. Given the number of players they have, this should not be a problem for the poker sites. And, if the hands are being manipulated so that more people go broke instead of winning, you may never see the entire bonus amount or will end up re-depositing to try to win that bonus amount.

If sites need something to attract new players or want to have players re-deposit, they should consider having services which protect the player from fraudulent activity. Prove to online poker players that they are not just trying to grow and off-shore account, but want to provide a service which is fair and unbiased. Better yet, allow the player to get the interest from the account with monthly statements from legitimate banking institutions. If we ever see a site providing such services, we will have truly reached an age where online poker is legit.

Food for Thought

Why do Full Tilt poker commercials talk about and demonstrate live play scenarios for an online site? Just about every commercial talks about why people play poker and most of them are about tells or situations involving live play, but are impossible to experience in online play.

Is the general public so gullible that they put together a series of commercials that play on their intelligence? My guess is that online play has too many differences to live play and this information would drive people away from online poker. Electronic data is easily manipulated and snooped but live cards are not.

Sitting at a live table has players policing the action, but online the players can only see their cards and the board. What happens electronically is completely hidden from their eyes. Did one of the other players see what I was holding? Did the dealer deal off the bottom of the deck? Online you have no idea. These are the things online poker rooms don't want to advertise.

Full Tilt presents the positives of live play while falsely giving current or new players a warm and fuzzy feeling that playing online is just as safe and secure as playing live.